


A Choral Chiral Christmas

by Shadow_Side



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Christmas fic, M/M, Multi, established threesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-09
Updated: 2017-12-09
Packaged: 2019-02-12 16:56:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12964059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadow_Side/pseuds/Shadow_Side
Summary: Night Vale's favourite triad are preparing to celebrate their first Christmas together, with everything you would expect. Family! Food! Joy! Mild social alarm!And then? Well, this is Night Vale. Sothen… something weird happens.[A stand-alone fic set inChiralityverse.]





	A Choral Chiral Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> It's the Chiralityverse Christmas special!
> 
> This one is set after _Three Strikes_ , so contains (significant) spoilers to that point, but no further. As always, please refer to the [Chiralityverse Series Notes](http://archiveofourown.org/series/146883) for some helpful guidance on reading orders for this series as a whole.
> 
> I hope you enjoy… and a Very Chiral Christmas to you all. ;-)

Carlos stands in front of the chalkboard in his lab, thinking deeply.

Something very strange is going on in Night Vale. It's been happening for over three weeks now, and he's been looking into it on and off, but as of yet he hasn't got it worked out. And yes – it's true – scientists do love solving problems, though this one is taking rather longer than he'd hoped.

Behind him, the door opens and someone comes pacing through from the house. Carlos is too deep in thought to react, at least until said someone slides arms around his waist and kisses his neck.

"You should come help," Cecil murmurs in Carlos' ear. "Or, at very least, defend me. Apparently Kevin takes the whole Christmas thing very seriously."

Carlos smiles, leaning back against the other man. "Imagine my surprise," he says. "But sure, I should probably come join in. I've been trying to solve this whole _thing_ ," and here he waves at the chalkboard, "for ages, but I'm getting nowhere."

"Is this something to do with all the weird events we've been broadcasting about?" Cecil asks.

"Yes. Like… there was that whole block near Old Town where it has actually been Christmas every day for at least two weeks now. Or the permanent snowstorm that has been sitting on top of Coyote Corners for the last ten days. And don't even get me started on that spate of literal heart-gifting that caught everyone over in Desert Bluffs off guard…"

Cecil gives a little shiver. "Yeah, that one really _was_ weird," he agrees. "Things seem normal here, though."

"As much as anything is ever normal in Night Vale," Carlos adds. He turns in Cecil's arms, giving him a quick kiss before stepping back. "Come on. You're right. We should go keep an eye on Kevin…"

They head out of the lab and through into the main living room, in search of their other boyfriend. The three of them have been together for over nine months now, and it's nothing short of wonderful. Yes, there have been some difficult times – given that major revolutions seem to follow them around – but in the end everything has worked out amazingly.

And now, they get to spend their first Christmas together with all three of them. Carlos has been looking forward to it for weeks, and he still can't quite believe it's Christmas Eve at last. Though – to be fair – this is a sensible mindset in Night Vale, given the obvious unreality of time.

"There you are!" Kevin calls, as soon as they pass in front of the door to the kitchen. "Come help me with this, would you?"

The kitchen itself is far more orderly than you would think, given how much simultaneous cooking and baking Kevin seems to be engaged in. He may have been out of Strexcorp for months now – and Strexcorp itself is in rather better shape since the revolution – but there's no end to his efficiency. Or his productivity. Or his slightly alarming obsession with both.

"What exactly are you doing?" Carlos asks, trying not to sound too wary.

"Working my magic!" Kevin insists, brightly. He's wearing an apron that reads 'A demon in the kitchen' and Carlos just has to hope that the man doesn't try to make that literal at any point.

Not again. Once was enough to prove that Azatothoth the Bloodthirsty cannot cook.

"You seem to have made rather a lot," Cecil remarks, looking around at everything.

"Of course I did, it's Christmas!" Kevin replies, turning back to whatever he's got bubbling away on the stove. "But take a look at my cupcakes. Aren't they _adorable?_ "

There's a little row of them sitting off to the side, each with a tiny snowman or Santa or festive government agent modelled in icing on the top. Twelve, in fact. Twelve festive cupcakes.

"I need to make more," Kevin goes on. "I just stopped at twelve for now, because… because."

"Well, you have all evening," Cecil reminds him, now stepping in behind Kevin and kissing him on the neck.

"Uh… not exactly," Kevin says, a little too quickly.

Cecil steps back, a suspicious look in his eyes. "What do you mean 'not exactly'?"

Kevin turns. "I… OK, don't get mad, but… I sort of arranged a Christmas Eve party. Here. As a surprise! It's why I've been doing so much cooking. I know we're seeing everyone tomorrow and the day after, but I thought it would be so _festive_ to get together tonight. So… I invited some people."

"Who, exactly?" Cecil asks.

"…Some people," Kevin replies, now clearly enjoying winding his double up a little. Out of love. And also out of badness. "Because it's Christmas. And Christmas is a time for _family_."

Cecil facepalms. "You invited Steve Carlsberg, didn't you?"

"I did do that, yes. And your sister. And my sister."

"What about the girls?" Cecil asks, hand still over his face. "What about Janice and Gillian?"

"Well, I thought about inviting them too, but then I thought maybe it would be fun to just have grown-ups tonight. So Steve and I arranged a special sleepover for them over at his place!"

"Don't they need an adult to watch them?" Carlos chips in.

"Sure they do!" Kevin agrees. "That's why I summoned Azzie earlier, and sent him over there."

Cecil is still facepalming. "In what insane world is your soul-bound demon a suitable childminder?"

"In this insane world, silly," Kevin insists. He claps Cecil on the shoulder, which makes his double finally drop his own hand, mostly so he can stare back. "Relax, Cecil, it's Christmas! Everything will be just fine. Also I invited your brother, too. And Earl. They're coming up through the portal from Nebolgorod this evening."

"OK, that part I'm happier with," Cecil replies. It's only been a couple of months since Cecil found out about his long-lost brother, Hunter – the accidental god-king of the miniature city – and the fact that his long-lost friend, Earl Harlan, has been living down there too. And it's clear he's pleased about the idea of seeing them again.

"See?" Kevin says, brightly. "I told you I was good at this."

"So… that's all the people you invited?" Carlos now asks, a hint of suspicion in his own tone. "Steve and Caitlin and Kirsten, and Hunter and Earl?"

"Oh no," Kevin says. "Not just them. I also invited your dad, and your delightful twin. They changed their travel plans in secret so they could get into town a few hours early."

Now it's Carlos' turn to facepalm. Much as he is looking forward to seeing them, he really does need a little more time to psych-up to being in the same room as Tomas. They reconnected only a few months back after many years of having no contact, and they're still rebuilding things between them.

Plus, Tomas works for the vague-yet-menacing government agency, so sometimes he can be quite hard to pin down.

"…Seriously?"

"Seriously!" The trouble is, Kevin is only trying to be nice. And helpful. And lovely. And it's nigh-on impossible to get mad with him.

"…Can't I have a doctor's note?"

"Oh, Carlos, Carlos, it will be great!" Kevin insists, turning back to whatever it is that he's got on the stove. "This is going to be the best Christmas ever."

Well. It's going to be memorable, if nothing else.

***

Kevin's sister is the first to arrive. There's knocking at the front door, and when Carlos goes to open it, he finds Kirsten on the doorstep.

"Hey, you," she greets him, immediately pulling him into a hug. Just like Kevin, Kirsten is very much a hands-on sort of person, albeit generally with fewer bladed weapons.

"Come on in," Carlos tells her. "You're the first. Kevin's down in the kitchen and… wait, do you see that?"

"Sure I do," Kirsten replies, looking at the little tree in the front garden that's bedecked with barely-existent Christmas lights in deep purple. "I didn't think they were real at first, but I can see some of them moving."

The things in question are a whole collection of red-breasted robins, all sitting in the tree amongst the lights, and watching them with dark, unblinking eyes. There's something bizarrely ominous about the sight, though Carlos can't quite pin down why. Eleven ominous robins?

"That's… odd," Carlos manages. "I've never seen so many of them together like that at once."

Could it be connected to all the other weird things that have been happening?

"Me neither," Kirsten agrees, and then she takes his arm and walks him back into the house, no doubt in search of her brother.

The man himself comes hurrying out of the kitchen as he hears the front door close, pulling his sister into a hug and then grinning as they break apart. "You made it! Did you find Steve's place OK?"

"Yeah," Kirsten replies. "It wasn't difficult. That giant radio antennae of his is visible for miles!"

"I know, right?" Cecil chips in, a little sullenly, joining them in the living room. "I keep telling him it isn't subtle, but does he listen to me?"

"Steve and Caitlin will be here imminently," Kirsten adds. "We all set out from his place together, but Steve said he had an errand to run en route. Something about a secret monolith society…"

Cecil facepalms and doesn't deign to comment further.

"Come on, you, come see all the food I've been making!" Kevin says, putting a hand on Kirsten's shoulder and gesturing towards the kitchen. "Although, to be fair, you can't actually _see_ all of it."

"Oooh, did you make invisible pie again?" Kirsten asks.

"Sure did!" Kevin tells her. "I couldn't decide on what kind, so I made every kind I know. Ten of them! Ten invisible pies!"

And, beaming, he leads Kirsten off into the kitchen, leaving Carlos and Cecil in the living room.

"I think Kevin is enjoying this more than we are," Carlos says, softly.

"Well, he doesn't have to deal with Steve," Cecil points out. "Not the way I do."

"Yeah," Carlos agrees, because it's usually better to agree where Steve is concerned. "Or with Tomas."

This makes Cecil smile, and pull him in closer. "Carlos, your twin is OK really."

"You wouldn't say that if you'd had to live with him!" Carlos replies.

"You're cuter though."

"We're identical!"

"I know. But you're still cuter."

"Charmer."

"Are you two being adorable again?" Kevin calls from the kitchen. He has a sixth sense about these things.

"Absolutely," Cecil calls back.

At this point, there's a knock at the door. And another. And another. A sequence of nine mysterious knocks, in careful rhythm.

Cecil groans. "Steve's here."

He's right. They open the door to find Steve on the threshold, with Cecil's sister Caitlin at his side.

"How was the monolith?" Cecil starts out at once.

"Don't talk about it in the open!" Steve retorts, looking around in obvious concern, and Carlos waves the two of them through the door before this can get any worse.

Caitlin hugs her brother when they're inside, whispering something in Cecil's ear that Carlos is sure amounts to 'play nice, it's Christmas' and which gets her a resigned but mostly-accepting look in reply.

Perhaps unhelpfully, Steve chooses this moment to try hugging Cecil, which results in the usual flapping and resistance and murmured, "Steve, _stop that_."

Cecil does care really. Deep down. _Deep_ down. Carlos is sure of it.

"So, we're still waiting on Hunter and Earl, and Carlos' family?" Caitlin asks.

"Yes," Carlos answers, trying not to sound too worried. Seeing his dad again, he can cope with, given that things seem to be OK between them. Seeing Tomas again… well. With Tomas, you can never be sure. "How are my dad and brother getting here, anyway?" he goes on, turning to Kevin.

"Your dad's flying in," Kevin answers. "He was due to land about an hour ago, so he shouldn't be too much longer. Assuming that time is working today."

"Which it usually isn't," Carlos reminds him. "What about Tomas?"

Kevin shrugs. "He was vague. Mentioned some kind of secret underground monorail and something about a giant slingshot…"

Carlos facepalms. "Sounds about right."

"Plus he's picking your dad up from the airport."

"I'm not sure whether to be relieved or concerned." A beat. "Probably both."

"Oh, Carlos, surely he can't be all that bad?" Kirsten says.

"You heard what happened the last time he came to town?"

"Yes. Kevin told me all about it."

"Then I rest my case."

There's a knock at the door.

"Speak of the devil…" Carlos murmurs.

"Oh, I didn't invite any of those," Kevin says.

"Only because you sent yours to look after our nieces!" Cecil reminds him.

"And Bharaeiogh too," Steve chips in.

Cecil stares at his brother-in-law. "You're telling me that not only is Azatothoth the Bloodthirsty looking after our nieces, but _your_ insane demon is there as well?!"

Carlos decides to go answer the door before this conversation gets any worse. He's not at all concerned about Janice and Gillian, both of whom are hyper-competent and more than capable of dealing with a pair of demons, but the concept of leaving said demons together unsupervised – Janice and Gillian notwithstanding – is rather more worrisome.

Still. It is Christmas. The season of goodwill.

And all that.

Beyond the front door, Carlos finds himself faced with his dad, Atilio, and his twin brother, Tomas. They're both wearing Santa hats (no doubt Tomas' idea) and they look delighted to see him.

"Carlos!" Tomas exclaims at once, flinging both arms around his brother and hugging him tight.

"…Hey, Tomas," Carlos manages. "Hey, Dad. Good flight?"

Tomas still hasn't let go of him.

"Yes, thank you," Atilio replies, with a little twinkle in his eye as he watches his sons.

"Good," Carlos says. "That's good. Time behaving itself?"

"Does it ever here?"

"Fair point. Tomas, please put me down now."

Tomas does as he's told, but there's still a wicked grin on his face.

"Come on in. Most of the others are here already."

He leads the way down to the living room. As soon as they get there, Tomas immediately decides to hug both Cecil and Kevin. At the same time.

"Merry Christmas to my favourite chiral doubles-in-law!" Tomas exclaims.

Cecil and Kevin wait a polite few seconds before gently prising their boyfriend's twin off.

"Hello, Tomas," Kevin says. "Hey, Atilio."

"Cecil, Kevin," Atilio replies. "And Steve, good to see you again. And… these must be Cecil and Kevin's sisters?"

"That's right," Caitlin says. "I'm Caitlin, and this is Kirsten. It's good to meet you at last. We've heard the stories."

"All good, I hope?" Atilio asks.

Caitlin smiles. "Of course."

"More chiral doubles!" Tomas exclaims in delight, now moving to hug Caitlin and Kirsten at the same time. "I'm Tomas. Carlos' brother. It's a pleasure."

Carlos facepalms some more. "Cecil, I think it's time for the Armagnac."

Cecil pats him on the shoulder. "I thought you'd never ask."

***

Perhaps mercifully, it isn't too much longer before Hunter and Earl show up. They've all just finished settling in the living room with the first round of drinks when there's a knock at the door.

"Perfect timing," Cecil says, heading out into the hallway. Carlos gets up and goes with him, partly to be companionable, and partly because he wonders if he might spot anything else weird in the process.

He hasn't forgotten about the weirdness. Or about his plan to solve it.

They open up the door to find Hunter Palmer and Earl Harlan on the other side. They're arm-in-arm – adorably so – and their faces light up at once.

"Cecil," Hunter says, "Carlos. So good to see you again."

"Likewise," Cecil tells him, moving in for a hug, before turning to hug Earl as well. "Come on in."

Both men are wearing very normal-looking outfits, which is a little unusual, given that Earl usually sticks with scoutmaster khaki, and Hunter favours the elaborate robes typical for his role as god-king of Nebolgorod. But they both tend to opt for something more incognito whenever they come up through the size-altering portal to the Overworld.

The one Carlos and Tomas built, after the incident in the fall. It really has been a very eventful year.

"Sorry we're a little late," Earl goes on, as they head inside. "We would've gotten here earlier, but there's traffic backed-up from Route 800 all the way into the city centre. A group of…" he lowers his voice, "… _angels_ has gathered at the intersection, and they're stopping everyone they can. And… saying 'Hark!' to them."

Cecil looks a mixture of bemused and concerned. "Hark, the herald angels… don't exist?" he tries.

Hunter laughs. "Quite."

But Carlos stops suddenly. That _has_ to be relevant. Right? Where is his chalkboard when he needs it..?

Cecil, meanwhile, is now waving Hunter and Earl through to the living room, where everyone else leaps up so they can exchange hugs and handshakes.

"Let me get you two a drink," Cecil offers. "Scotch? Or do you want to join Carlos and I with the Armagnac?"

"Scotch is good," Hunter replies, as he and Earl settle in the remaining space on one of the couches.

"I'll go for an Armagnac," Earl says. "For old time's sake."

"So is this all of us?" Hunter asks, as Cecil fixes the drinks.

"For tonight, it is," Kevin replies. "I invited Naomi and Darla as well, but tonight's the Strexcorp Christmas Party, and Naomi insisted on staying to oversee it. The punters are laying odds that this will be the first one ever without a death toll!"

Atilio looks a little alarmed.

"That's a good thing," Carlos points out, reassuringly. "Strex… Strex is better now. On account of the extensive change in management."

This is an understatement in so many ways.

"But we're seeing them tomorrow," Kevin goes on. "Naomi's hosting Christmas dinner. And you can just _bet_ it will be amazing. Plus we'll get to play charades!"

Carlos tries to keep his expression level at this. He and Cecil have had the distinct pleasure of playing charades with Kevin before, and the small, wicked part of him that he tries to pretend isn't there is looking forward to seeing everyone else experience that for the first time.

It is Christmas, after all…

"I can't wait!" Tomas exclaims, brightly. "It will be good to meet these friends of yours in person. They sound like great fun!"

"They are," Carlos replies. "Just… if Darla invites you to come see the basement… remember to decline politely."

"Awww, it's just a little necromancy," Kirsten says, with an unusually wicked look.

"It is not 'a little necromancy'," Kevin points out, with an unusually _sensible_ look. "It is _a lot_ of necromancy."

"…Well, true," his sister concedes. Sort of.

"Should I be worried?" Atilio asks.

"No more than usual," Carlos manages.

Perhaps mercifully, Kevin then gets to his feet. "I'm just going to check on things in the kitchen," he says. "I have a _lot_ cooking at once…"

"How are you _this_ good at multi-tasking?" Kirsten asks.

Her brother shrugs. "Lifetime of working for Strex, I guess. Encourages efficiency. And, you know, some minor stabbings. But mostly efficiency!"

And, with a grin, he heads off to the kitchen.

"Kevin's in a good mood," Atilio remarks. "I mean, more so than usual."

"Well, it's our first Christmas together," Cecil says. "And he was already very fond of Christmas to begin with. And he's _really_ enjoyed doing all this cooking, although – I'm gonna level with you – " and he lowers his voice, "there may be some _wheat and wheat by-products_ in it. That demon of his smuggles in _flour_ every now and then."

"You like it really!" Kevin calls, from the kitchen.

"…I like it really," Cecil concedes, quietly.

"Also… uhm… could I maybe borrow a scientist for a moment?" Kevin now says, suddenly sounding a little perplexed.

"Oooh, is it a baking quandary?" Tomas exclaims, immediately leaping to his feet. "I love those!"

"No, no, it's… a science quandary," Kevin replies. "Possibly I need all the scientists. And maybe the rest of you. Or… a large net."

Everyone exchanges a series of perplexed looks, and they slowly rise to their feet, going to find out what's happening. Carlos makes it through the kitchen door first, and sees that Kevin is at the window, staring out into the back garden.

"I know I like Christmas surprises," Kevin says, "but I swear this one wasn't me."

And he gestures to the window.

They crowd round, and stare out through it. And then stare some more.

"That's…" Caitlin tries.

"…weird?" Kirsten suggests.

'Weird' is one word for it. There are eight reindeer in the back garden. Eight inexplicable reindeer. And all of them have glowing red noses. And three eyes.

"…Huh," Cecil manages. "Where did they come from?"

" _That's_ the first question you ask?" Carlos replies, a little incredulous.

"Yeah, _my_ first question would have been 'so where's Santa Claus?'" Tomas says, grinning, and looking like he's thoroughly enjoying himself.

Carlos stares at his twin. "Tell me this wasn't you," he implores.

Tomas holds up his hands. "Totally innocent," he replies. "Of this, at least."

"So…"

They all stare out at the reindeer again, which are calmly milling around and eating the lawn. And vibrating somewhat.

"We should probably stay _away_ from those," Kevin points out. "You know, because of all the incidents…"

"Wasn't that just to do with regular deer?" Steve asks.

"You want to risk it?"

"…Good point."

"It might be nothing," Cecil says. "I mean, this is Night Vale. There are _often_ weird deer. Or normal deer. Where else would the realtors live? So… maybe this is just the Christmas version. And–"

He's cut off in mid-sentence as they all hear, quite clearly, footsteps up on the roof.

"…No," Carlos says, flatly, before anyone else can suggest the obvious.

Tomas bounces up and down in glee, and claps his hands together.

"No," Carlos insists, more firmly.

"Anyone else think that might be Santa Claus?" Earl asks.

Carlos facepalms, and Cecil puts an arm around him. "I'll see if I can find a ladder."

***

They all go outside. It's dark, and the air is cool, but that certainly doesn't explain why there is _snow_ on the roof of the house. Or why the snow is _only_ on the roof of the house.

"…Does this happen a lot?" Atilio asks, as they stare up at it.

"This is only my third Christmas here," Carlos manages. "But, so far, this is new."

"It's hardly the weirdest thing that's ever happened, though," Cecil says, way too calmly, as he paces over with the ladder.

"…True," Steve agrees. "But… there does seem to be someone stuck in your chimney."

"I feared as much…" Carlos murmurs.

"Anyone want to volunteer to go up there?" Cecil now asks.

Tomas practically bounces up and down. "Me! Me! I'll go!" he exclaims.

Atilio looks worried. "Is that wise?"

"Sure it is!" Tomas insists, before Carlos can voice concerns of his own. "I'm very good at ladders. And rooftops. And chasing people over them, as it happens, but shhhhhh, don't tell anyone."

Now Carlos simply facepalms.

Tomas, meanwhile, takes the ladder from Cecil and props it against the side of the house, before calmly starting to climb up it. Everyone else stands watching for a moment; at least until they all spot the latest development.

"…uh, Tomas?" Cecil calls out, the only one seemingly brave enough to do so. "I don't want to worry you or anything, but that… _figure_ … in the chimney appears to have rather a lot of… appendages."

Almost at the top of the ladder, Tomas pauses, and replies without turning around. "You mean tentacles, right?"

"…I'm afraid so."

"Not _again_ ," Tomas murmurs, and then – a little louder – he adds, "I'll be careful!"

"Maybe one of us should go up there to help," Carlos says, but doesn't move.

"Are you volunteering?" his father asks, sounding somewhat nervous.

"Uh… no," Carlos has to admit, looking at his two chiral boyfriends imploringly. Although, he can't quite help hoping that they _don't_ volunteer, because he really doesn't want to think about them being up there with _whatever_ that thing is.

"I'll go," Steve chips in, brightly.

"Please don't die on my roof, Steve," Cecil tells him.

"I'm not going to die at all, Cecil," Steve replies. "It's Christmas."

His train of logic may have derailed slightly at some point. Although, Carlos is not at all sure you can apply any kind of logic to this situation, so maybe the whole issue is moot.

"You be careful," Caitlin says, putting a hand on her husband's shoulder. "Let's not have a repeat of the satellite dish incident."

"…That was one time and I said I was sorry…" Steve murmurs, and then promptly heads off towards the ladder before anyone can pay too much attention to his reaction.

"Oh, are you coming up as well?" Tomas calls down. "Excellent, this might take two of us."

He's up on the rooftop now, and carefully making his way through the inexplicable snow towards the chimney. And it's at _this_ point that there is a sudden hissing sound.

"…OK, I _really_ don't mean to seem alarmist, but you all hear that, right?" Cecil now says.

Everyone nods. It's a hard sound to miss, and a worrying one at that.

"It's sort of familiar," Earl remarks. "It reminds me of…"

"…those little things Cecil used to summon back in his wild youth!" Steve calls, from halfway up the ladder.

Cecil blushes, and Kevin starts beaming; the way he always does whenever anyone brings up the fact that Cecil used to enjoy summoning things. And still does, on occasion, when Kevin talks him into it.

(It's extremely hot. Though Carlos tries not to admit this too often.)

The moment is broken as a whole collection of _things_ suddenly crawl into view from the unseen side of the rooftop.

"Oh!" Tomas exclaims, in delight. "Elves!"

Carlos wants to facepalm, but doesn't dare look away. The things in question look more like the weird imp-things that he's seen Kevin – and Cecil – summon on occasion, except that they're all wearing little red and green outfits, and tiny, sparkling shoes.

In other words, they're dressed like Christmas elves. Except Carlos is confident that Christmas elves a) do not exist, and b) don't generally hunt in packs. And yet, there are seven of them, slowly creeping along the rooftop.

Seven hissing elves.

"Steve, be careful!" Cecil shouts, then tries to act as if he did no such thing.

"You _do_ care!" Steve calls back.

"A little help, here!" Tomas adds.

What happens next does so very fast. Steve makes it to the top of the ladder, just as the seven elves are about to leap on Tomas. Distracted by having a second target, the elves collide in a tangle of felt and bells, now hissing at each other and trying to work out which of the squishy humans to go for first. A second later, Tomas shouts, "oh, I've got an idea!" and then turns, going over to the chimney and taking hold of the trapped figure, promptly yanking it free.

Well. It _sort_ of looks like Santa. Just… with more tentacles. And – now it's free of the chimney – rather large wings. The creature lets out a shriek and charges past Tomas, launching into the air at the same instant as all the elves decide to attack it first, and leap on it.

The end result is – as far as Carlos' stunned, alarmed mind can process – some kind of winged, demonic Santa flying off into the night whilst simultaneously fighting with a small swarm of elves which are all clinging to it. He stares at the thing as it disappears into the dark; not quite sure what to do when the hissing sounds finally fade and stillness returns.

"…OK, gonna level with you, that was weird," Hunter manages.

"It really was," Kirsten agrees. "Did someone summon those things?"

"Totally innocent!" Kevin insists, at once.

Up on the rooftop, Tomas brushes aside some of the snow and sits calmly down, staring at the sky. "Great view from up here!" he enthuses. "You should come join me."

"No, Tomas," Carlos replies.

Steve, however – being already at the top of the ladder – opts to scramble right up and sits next to Tomas, looking up at the star-filled sky. "Which ones are spy planes?" he asks.

Tomas grins. "All of them."

Cecil facepalms. "I think it's time for more Armagnac."

***

They all go back inside.

"What about the reindeer?" Atilio asks. "Are they still in your garden?"

Carlos peers out through the back window. "…Yep," he answers.

"We should maybe leave them there," Kevin suggests. "At least for now."

"Besides, they're pretty normal by Night Vale's standards," Cecil adds.

"So… tell me honestly," Caitlin now says, sliding an arm around Steve's waist and clearly glad that her husband is no longer on the roof. "Was that actually Santa Claus?"

Cecil looks perplexed. "It can't have been. Everyone knows 'Santa' is actually a team of drugged bears working for the CIA."

Atilio stares at him. A lot. Tomas, meanwhile, laughs. "They're a fun bunch, once you get to know them. I went to their Christmas party this year."

Now his father stares at him. "…bears?" he manages.

"Yep!" Tomas replies, brightly.

"You went to their Christmas party?!" Steve exclaims.

"Yep!" Tomas says, again, whilst Steve stares at him in a mixture of delight and concern.

"So, wait, hold on," Earl cuts in. "If Santa _isn't_ a jolly old man in a red suit, what _was_ that thing?"

Most of the group now turns immediately to Kevin. "I told you, I am totally innocent!" he insists. "I did not under any circumstances invoke a festive demon and its little helpers as a Christmas surprise! Though I sort of wish I had because that would have been _so_ much fun."

"They tried to eat Steve!" Caitlin points out.

"Only a little," Kevin replies, hastily. "And, like I said, totally innocent. Plus, I don't think that was a demon. I think it might have been whatever the Santa Claus mythos was based on. You know how these things evolve over time."

"So… what, it was the Ur-Santa?" Steve asks.

"Exactly," Kevin says. "You know how that old song goes. _'You'd better watch out…'_ "

**Oh!**

Carlos snaps his fingers. "That's it!" he exclaims. "I've got it!"

"You have?" Cecil asks.

"Yes!" Carlos replies. "To the lab!"

He's always wanted to say that.

***

So now they all head through into the lab, and Carlos is so distracted by what he's just worked out that he doesn't even stop to tell Tomas not to touch the glassware. And not to reorganise it.

The group gathers around the chalkboard, where all of Carlos' notes on this latest mystery are scrawled. "OK, look at this," he starts out. "There have been weird events happening all over Night Vale since the start of the month. Constant blizzards, despite the fact that we live in a desert. Actual heart-gifting. A giant snowman chasing anyone who wasn't getting into the festive spirit."

"And there was that day all the buses turned into horse-drawn sleighs," Kevin adds. "That was a little strange."

"Oh, did you get that too?" Kirsten asks. "I thought that was just over in the Bluffs. The heart-gifting thing was super-weird, though. And messy."

"…Oh, I see what's going on here," Tomas says. "It's the songs."

Carlos nods. "It's the songs."

"The songs?" Hunter repeats.

"Yes," Carlos answers. "All the weird things that are happening? They're all from Christmas songs."

"…Is that even possible?" Atilio manages.

Everyone else shrugs. "Round here, yes," Cecil says.

"So… what do we do about it?" Steve now asks. "I mean… some of this stuff isn't dangerous, but some of it? Really not safe at all!"

"Steve's right," Caitlin agrees. "But… how do you fight a song?"

There are suddenly a lot of wry looks going around. "It wouldn't be the first time," Cecil points out.

"This time will be much safer," Carlos insists, hopefully. "I have an idea for something I could build. I… might need a little help, though."

He looks over at his brother, who is now in the middle of rearranging all of Carlos' glassware. He sighs. "Tomas, leave the beakers alone."

"But look!" Tomas exclaims, brightly. "I made a festive pyramid!"

And, sure enough, he has. Mercifully, it's a small one, made of just six beakers. Six precarious beakers.

In the grand scheme of things, it could be worse.

"…This is why I don't let you in my lab," Carlos murmurs.

***

In fairness, he and Tomas work together surprisingly well, once Carlos manages to get his twin to stop upsetting the order of the glassware. He tries to persuade everyone else to go and sit in the living room, where it's more comfortable, but they insist on not leaving him and Tomas out, and instead settle at the back row of benches.

And, whilst Carlos and Tomas work, they all talk. They talk about the things you would expect people to talk about at a Christmas party – about family, about work, about all the food they're looking forward to – and it would almost feel _normal_ , were they not also sitting in the lab whilst the two scientists in the family build a device to save them all from Christmas songs turned real.

…'the two scientists in the family'. Because, they _are_ all a family now, aren't they? A weird family, yes, but what good family _isn't_ a bit weird in its own way?

Maybe this one is a lot weird.

It's getting close to midnight when Carlos' cellphone rings. Or, more accurately, it rings loudly five times and then goes silent, even though the caller is still ring _ing_.

Five. Five bold rings.

…there's no denying that this is a thing now.

Carlos picks up the phone from the bench and answers, putting it on speakerphone. "Hey, Carlos, it's Frederick," comes the voice on the other end.

Frederick is one of Carlos' scientific team, and is famous for – amongst other things – a specialism in mystic rocks and a fondness for building lethal, oversized weaponry in his spare time.

"Oh, hey, Frederick," Carlos replies. "Is everything OK? I thought you were spending Christmas Eve with your brother?"

"I was," Frederick says. "I mean, I am, but something came up. You know how Archie – my brother – is in the secret police? Well, he had a call earlier this evening, and it was about something so weird that I got a few of the others together and we went to investigate it."

"Who else is there?" Carlos asks.

"It's just me, and Toby and Arlene, and Vincent," Frederick tells him. "Four of us. Four brilliant scientists! I figured that would be enough to work this one out, but… Carlos, we're a little stumped."

Deep breath. "Tell me what happened."

"Well, we're down at the harbour and waterfront recreation area," Frederick explains. "And… three ships just came sailing in."

"…Wait, isn't Night Vale in the middle of the desert?" Atilio chips in, looking stunned.

"Oh, is that your dad?" Frederick exclaims.

"Yes," Carlos answers. "Everyone's here. We've been trying to solve a mystery of our own, and I think your thing is connected to it. I know it sounds weird – and not exactly scientific – but it seems as though Christmas songs are coming true."

"…Wow, that makes way more sense than anything else we've come up with," comes Toby's voice, in the background.

"Yeah, we thought maybe Nulogorsk were trying to invade," Arlene adds. "This is much better."

"…how are there _ships_ in the _desert_?" Atilio exclaims, clearly having a lot of trouble with this part.

Carlos stares at him. "We just watched a winged, tentacled Santa grappling with a swarm of miniature fanged elves, and _that's_ the thing you question?"

"You really do live in a _very_ strange place," his father remarks.

"Don't I know it?" his son answers, wryly, before turning back to the phone. "Frederick, you can all stand down. Tomas and I have got this under control."

"OK, if you're sure," Frederick replies. "Unless you want us to come help?"

"Go enjoy Christmas with your family. And see if you can persuade the secret police not to shoot at those ships."

"No promises!" Frederick answers, brightly. "Merry Christmas, everyone!"

And he hangs up.

"…Three ships?" Earl manages.

"Yep," Carlos says. "Three impossible ships."

***

It's just before midnight when Carlos and Tomas finally announce that they're done. Everyone comes to crowd round the main bench, to see what they've built.

"It's a… what is it?" Kevin asks.

"It's a highly scientific device," Carlos insists, hoping they won't question it too much. "A highly scientific device that emits highly scientific and completely harmless energy. Scientifically. Also it generates numbers on this readout here."

"I… see," Steve says. "And the weather balloons?"

"They're to make it fly, of course!" Tomas says. "I wanted to stick with one, but Carlos said we needed two."

"Two weather balloons," Carlos adds, without thinking about it.

"But… how does it work?" Cecil asks.

"Science," Carlos insists.

"Science?" his father repeats.

Tomas nods. "Science."

"And now..?" Hunter asks.

"Now we launch it, of course," Tomas answers. "You should all come watch."

So they do.

***

Everyone heads back outside. The mysterious snow is still on the roof, but there's no sign of any tentacled-Santas, or anything else that might give above-average cause for alarm. And it looks as though the reindeer haven't escaped from the back garden yet.

This is probably for the best. It might be something of an issue for future-Carlos, but – then again – it might be one of those problems that solves itself. Or one of those problems that he's about to solve with science.

They activate the device and inflate the two weather balloons, and – slowly – they start to rise into the air, lifting the highly scientific object along with them. Up and up they go, whilst everyone watches.

"Carlos," Cecil says. "Can I ask one question?"

"Sure you can."

"Why is it shaped like a star?"

"Because it's Christmas."

And there it hangs, in the sky over Night Vale. A science star.

A science star for all to see.

"…Will that fix everything?" Kirsten asks, cautiously.

"Yep," Carlos replies.

"How?" Caitlin asks.

"Because it's Christmas! Also, science."

"You're sure?" Atilio pushes.

"We are totally sure," Tomas insists.

Earl looks over at him. "Because..?"

"Because science!" both twins exclaim, in unison.

"So… we can stop worrying now?" Hunter asks.

"I don't think you ever needed to _worry_ , exactly," Carlos says, despite the fact that he himself has been doing a fair amount of it. "Weird things happen here all the time."

Both of his boyfriends step in closer, and each slides an arm around his waist. "You're so smart," Kevin says, happily. "What time is it?"

"Time doesn't exist," Carlos reminds him. "But…"

He looks at Cecil, who glances at his watch. "Midnight," he answers, and then smiles. "Merry Christmas, everyone. I guess our Christmas Eve party went a little strange."

"Cecil," Steve says, warmly, "we'd expect nothing less."

***

They spend the next hour engaged in the rather more normal activity of sitting in the living room with another round of drinks, whilst Kevin brings out some of the food he's been cooking. And all of it is _highly_ delicious, and the general consensus is that he _is_ a demon in the kitchen.

Eventually, there's no denying the fact that they should be going to bed. Steve and Caitlin call a cab so that they can head off, and Cecil even lets Steve hug him goodnight without any of the usual flapping. Kirsten goes with them – she's staying at their house until tomorrow, when they're all descending on Naomi and Darla's place over in Desert Bluffs for dinner.

Hunter and Earl are staying in the main guestroom, whilst Atilio is on a fold-out bed in the living room, and Tomas on one of the couches. Which all means Carlos still feels like he has a houseful even once he's ready for bed, and heading off towards it after saying goodnight to his twin and his dad.

It has been an interesting evening. But… a good one. And it reminds him how happy he is to have them back in his life, and how glad he is that Cecil has his own brother back in _his_ life.

And… seriously, they are all a family now, and that's wonderful in a way Carlos never really expected until it happened.

The bedroom is dark when he steps into it, pulling off his pyjama shirt as he goes, and he guesses his two chiral boyfriends must already be in bed. It _is_ very late, after all, and plus – given that they have a houseful – they can't exactly do anything _involved_.

Or so he thinks. The second he shuts the bedroom door, Carlos finds himself grabbed from behind, a hand pressed over his mouth, and his heart starts to race at once. He can't stop a slight squeak of alarm, despite the fact that it only takes a second for him to realise what's going on.

"Shhhh," Kevin breathes in his ear. "You're going to want to be very quiet. We do have guests, after all."

"But," Cecil adds, leaning in to speak softly into Carlos' other ear, "we didn't want to miss out on the chance to give you an early Christmas present. We knew you'd approve. And you did just save the town with science again…"

Kevin slowly moves the hand from Carlos' mouth, letting him speak. "I approve," Carlos answers. "But… I'm not always so good at the quiet part…"

"Don't you worry," Kevin tells him, whispered voice full of promise. "I'll help with that. Of course, we might also have to make it a little challenging for you…"

"Maybe even a _lot_ challenging," Cecil adds.

They are wicked. Carlos adores them both.

"…Mercy?" he tries.

" _Not a chance_ ," both doubles tell him. In unison.

" **Oh** ," Carlos gasps in delight, right before he gets a hand pressed over his mouth again.

He can't help loving that. The edge of control, mixed with the promise of being overwhelmed, and all of it subsumed by the knowledge that he is completely, utterly safe at the same time.

The darkness is an interesting touch. They normally keep a light or two on until they actually start going to sleep, so being walked over to the bed in the dark feels all the more exciting. When they're close, Kevin stays wrapped around him from behind, hand still over his mouth, whilst Cecil moves in front. His hands slide over Carlos' skin, tracing the curves of his chest, and then Cecil leans in closer, one hand drifting down between Carlos' legs.

That makes him moan more than a little, though he tries to stifle the reaction.

"I know what you want," Cecil breathes. "I know what you _need_. And… I know you'd beg me for it, if Kevin let you. Isn't that right?"

Carlos gives a tiny nod, and a soft murmur of agreement. Because he would.

The hand between his legs slips into his pyjama trousers and starts to stroke him slowly, and that makes Carlos whimper, as quietly as he can.

"Shhhh," Kevin says, softly. "Just give in to it. Let your mind go under. We've got you. And you know you're safe with us…"

He does. He is. But it is not easy to stay quiet when one of your boyfriends has a hand over your mouth and the other is gradually stroking you harder and harder. He whimpers again, a tremor of pleasure running through him, and Kevin slides his other arm around Carlos' waist, holding him a little more firmly.

"Does that feel good?" Cecil asks, working Carlos' clothing out of the way so as to give himself better access.

Carlos gives a muffled " _ohyes_ ," and nods several times, and he can just make out Cecil smiling in the darkness.

"Maybe I should just keep doing this," Cecil says, his voice low and just a tiny bit dangerous. "See if you come before your knees give way…"

That makes Carlos gasp a little more loudly, and Kevin tightens the hand over his mouth, pressing in closer again. "Quiet, now," he chides. "Otherwise we might have to stop…"

Carlos goes incredibly still at that, barely even breathing for a moment, because the last thing he wants is for either of them to stop right now. The reaction makes Cecil laugh, soft and endeared, lifting his free hand to stroke gently over Carlos' face.

"It won't come to that," he says. "Will it? You're going to be good for us."

Carlos nods rather a lot, and he's smart enough not to make a sound this time.

"That's it," Cecil breathes. "That's it…"

His voice is starting to lull Carlos under now. And that's always a good thing – because it feels so very wonderful – but right now it's an even better thing, because it makes staying quiet rather easier.

"That's it," Kevin echoes, kissing Carlos on the neck. "Let go…"

Caught on the cusp of mental surrender, Carlos can't help another little whimper as the firm stroking gets faster; Cecil clearly intent on pulling him over the edge sooner rather than later.

"Don't resist," Cecil says, leaning in closer. "Don't hold back. We want to feel you fall apart completely. _And you know what will happen once you do_."

Carlos does. And he wants that too. _Badly_. He gives a muffled gasp at the thought, which turns into something closer to a moan as the pleasure building through his body ratchets suddenly higher.

If he could speak right now, he'd most likely be begging. And he knows they know. He can tell by the look in Cecil's eyes in the near-darkness; by the way Kevin holds him closer.

"Shhhh," the man behind him breathes. "Give in to us. Just give in."

It's too much now, and Carlos knows he doesn't stand a chance. Another wave of pleasure breaks through him, and it's enough to kick him right over the edge. Somehow, he manages not to cry out too loudly as he comes – the hand still over his mouth helps in that regard – although he really isn't as quiet as he should be.

But it feels so very good. So damnably, wonderfully good.

When the pleasure starts to fade, his knees do almost give way, but Kevin already has firm hold of him, and doesn't let him fall. He moves the hand from Carlos' mouth, wrapping him in more, whilst Cecil keeps on slowly stroking him as the last waves subside.

"Was that what you needed?" Cecil murmurs, leaning in close.

" _Yes_ ," Carlos breathes, soft and blissed-out. "Oh yes."

"We thought so," Kevin tells him. "And now…"

"…I'll do anything you say," Carlos gasps. " _Anything_."

Cecil smiles. "We know."

They guide him over to the bed, lying him on his back in the middle, and that's _extremely_ welcome right now. As is the part where they pull the last of his clothing off in the process, before doing the same to themselves.

And then they lie down either side of him, curled in close, and _wow_ but he loves it when they do that. Especially when he knows they have plans for him.

"Hands above your head," Kevin says, and Carlos' heart starts to race again as he does as he's told. As soon as he has, Kevin pulls his wrists closer together, holding them down with a hand of his own, and pressing his other hand over Carlos' mouth again.

That makes Carlos whimper a lot, a renewed burst of need blazing through him. Cecil slips a knee between his legs and leans in, hand up to stroke through Carlos' hair.

"We love you so much," he says. "And we know what you need. What you _still_ need. But don't forget… you have to stay quiet. _And I'm about to make that a little more challenging_."

'A little' is a misnomer. It is not a _little_ more challenging. It is a _lot_. Because now Cecil reaches for the lubricant, slicking three fingers with it, whilst Kevin slides a knee between Carlos' legs as well, pulling them apart.

Carlos gasps at being bared open like that, and then gasps rather more as Cecil slowly pushes a finger into him. The already-dark room seems to go darker still, and he can feel the weight of their eyes on him as he arches up a little, trying not to cry out.

"Good," Kevin murmurs, his voice taking on that low, hypnotic edge that never fails to drive Carlos slightly insane. "Good. That's it. Do you want more?"

Carlos nods. A lot.

Cecil laughs, softly. "I thought as much. You'd beg for that too, wouldn't you?"

Carlos nods even more, and then Cecil and Kevin exchange a look. And, even in the darkness, Carlos can tell it's a look with clear purpose. But they don't give him a chance to work out what that purpose might be, because all of a sudden Kevin moves the hand from Carlos' mouth, surging in to kiss him, whilst Cecil simultaneously slips a second finger in alongside the first.

It's just a good thing that Kevin is kissing him _before_ the second finger goes in, because it means his cry of shocked bliss is mostly muffled by the other man's lips. He still moans rather a lot, though, which means he gets a hand back over his mouth as soon as the kiss breaks.

"Liked that, did you?" Kevin says. "Maybe I'll do it again…"

Carlos is clearly more out of his mind than he realises, because his brain doesn't quite process that Kevin means _now_ , and as such he jumps somewhat when the hand is moved from his mouth and Kevin surges in to kiss him once more. He _certainly_ isn't expecting the third finger that Cecil slips inside him at the same time, even though – again – he should be.

And he moans in shameless delight, right before his bliss-addled mind folds in two and he goes straight under.

Cecil and Kevin can clearly tell, because they slow down a little, watching his face carefully once Kevin pulls back from the kiss.

"That's it," Cecil breathes. "There you go. We've got you."

" _Please_ ," Carlos whispers, because he can speak right now, and because he needs to. Because he needs _them_.

"We love you so much," Kevin tells him, gently kissing him on the jaw.

"I love you too," Carlos murmurs. "Both of you. _Lots_."

Cecil, meanwhile, carefully pulls his fingers back and reaches for the lubricant again, slicking himself with it and then starting to slowly push into Carlos. Kevin stays close whilst he does, leaning in to kiss Carlos in time to capture another soft moan from his lips.

" _Oh yes_ ," Cecil breathes, as their hips lock together. "Oh, Carlos, you feel _amazing_."

"You… so good… I… _oh_ …" Carlos manages, his mind wanting to speak but the words turning out to be harder to string together than he expected.

Cecil laughs warmly, and kisses him, and then pulls Kevin in too, kissing him as well. "Where do you want me?" his double asks.

The man seems increasingly in favour of deferring to Cecil at times like this. It's starting to make Carlos wonder. Although he's rather too distracted right now to dwell on it for more than a few seconds.

"I want you to watch," Cecil answers. "And then I want to watch _you_."

Kevin smiles, and reaches up to kiss Cecil again. " _Gladly_ ," he replies.

Cecil starts to move his hips, now, and the feeling as he does is enough to make Carlos stifle another cry, managing to turn it into a whimper and a rather sharp gasp. He bites his lip, trying not to make a sound, but with every thrust deep inside him it gets more and more challenging.

"Oh…" he murmurs. "Oh… I… _please_ … please don't stop…"

"I won't," Cecil tells him. "Don't you worry. _I won't_."

He doesn't. And, the more he doesn't, the more Carlos can feel his mind falling deeper into the glorious black. And yes, he's already come, but that doesn't stop this feeling insanely wonderful; waves of pleasure rolling through him over and over.

"I'm yours," he whispers. "Both of you. Yours. All yours."

"You are," Cecil agrees. "And we are all _yours_."

They are. Whether they're driving him gloriously out of his mind, or curled in a gentle tangle. Or just living out the daily rhythm of life. They're his.

And he couldn't ask for a better Christmas present.

Cecil kisses him again, his breathing ragged now, and it's clear he's right on the edge. He comes after another moment, managing not to cry out, but gasping sharply as pleasure bursts through him. He half-collapses over Carlos as the climax subsides, kissing him on the jaw and just resting close to him for a moment.

"Love you," Cecil murmurs. "Love you so much."

He slowly lifts himself back up, reaching over to pull Kevin in again and kissing him too. " _Impress me_ ," he breathes, as the kiss breaks.

Kevin's expression floods with delight. "Don't I always?"

Gently, lingeringly, Cecil pulls back, climbing off Carlos and lying down beside him. As he does, Kevin moves between Carlos' legs, finally letting go of his wrists.

"I'm sure I can trust you to keep your hands there," he says, and Carlos nods rather a lot in response.

Kevin reaches for the lubricant now, slicking himself with it and curling over Carlos, starting to push into him. It makes Carlos whimper in pleasure at the renewed attention, and he wraps his legs around Kevin's waist once the other man is in place.

"Is that good?" Kevin murmurs, with a smile that makes it quite clear he already knows the answer to his own question, but wants to hear it anyway.

"Yes. _Oh_ yes," Carlos replies. "So good…"

The other man starts to move his hips now, cupping Carlos' face and kissing him as he does. And then he's moving faster, and Carlos has to bite his lip again to keep from crying out, shaking bodily at how good it feels.

"You both look _amazing_ ," Cecil says, voice still a little hazy from lingering pleasure, as he watches them.

Kevin is clearly set on impressing his double as well as driving Carlos even further out of his own mind, because he speeds up at that. He presses in to capture another kiss, and it's a good thing he does because he's just in time to stifle another cry from Carlos.

"Oh no, you don't," he murmurs, with a wicked little grin, as the kiss breaks.

"I'll… more… please, more… do anything…" Carlos gasps, vaguely aware that the words aren't quite in the right order.

That makes Kevin speed up all the more, so that every thrust makes Carlos gasp out loud, and he's not even sure how he's keeping from screaming the roof off in bliss. He looks over at Cecil almost imploringly, and it's something of a relief when – understanding – Cecil leans in to press a hand over Carlos' mouth again.

He likes that. A _lot_. And so, it seems, does Kevin, because he breathes a soft, " _ohyes_ ," his hips bucking a little in pleasure before he finds his rhythm again.

Although, he's obviously not going to last much longer. "So close," he gasps. "So… _yes_ … _**yes**_ …"

It's only another moment before he comes, his whole body tensing right before completion breaks through him. He doesn't stop moving all the way through, claiming every last second of pleasure before he drops down against Carlos, gasping hard. Cecil moves the hand from Carlos' mouth, meaning that Kevin can press in to kiss him again, before curling in against his chest and just lying there for a moment.

Cecil reaches out to stroke gently through Kevin's hair. "Good?" he says.

" _Sogood_ ," Kevin breathes, not yet lifting his head. "Carlos?"

" **Best Christmas ever** ," the scientist manages.

That makes Cecil laugh. "We knew you'd approve. And, you know, it's important to create plenty of Christmas _traditions_."

"Yes. That. Like that," Carlos murmurs. "Lots of that. For _Christmas_."

They lie as they are for another moment, and then Kevin slowly pulls back, rolling Carlos onto his side so that Cecil can wrap him in close, before spooning in tightly behind him.

"…We should do this again," Carlos says, aware he's speaking without thinking but deciding he doesn't mind. "Lots."

Cecil kisses him on the forehead. "We already do this lots," he points out, happily.

"Yes," Carlos agrees, hazily. "But. _More_ lots. Especially the thing with the taking me by surprise. And the taking advantage of me thing. And… all of it. Lots."

"We thought you might like that," Kevin replies, kissing his shoulder.

Carlos smiles. "Yeah," he breathes. "Sleep now?"

They both wrap him in tighter, holding hands against his hip. "Yes," Cecil says, softly. "Sleep now."

And as Carlos slowly starts to drift off, he keeps smiling to himself. It really _is_ the best Christmas ever. But, then again, with his two chiral lovers wrapped around him, how could it be anything else?

"Merry Christmas, my dear enantiomers," he murmurs.

"Merry Christmas, Carlos," they reply.

**Author's Note:**

> EDIT: So I totally failed to put this note in when I first published this one. Ooops! (I do a lot of my writing in my favourite cinema coffee shop, and follow it up by going to see a movie, and in this particular case I was rushing to get posted before we needed to go in, and I meant to go back and add this note when I got home, and I forgot.)
> 
> The songs referenced in this one are:
> 
> The Twelve Days of Christmas  
> I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday  
> Let It Snow  
> Last Christmas (I Gave You My Heart)  
> Hark, the Herald Angels Sing  
> Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer  
> Santa Claus is Coming to Town  
> Frosty the Snowman  
> Jingle Bells  
> I Saw Three Ships
> 
> Given the prevailing song-theme that runs through the main series, it seemed apt to bring it up again for the Christmas special!
> 
> Peace out, dear readers. Whatever this time of year is to you, I hope it contains plenty of hope and joy. :-)


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